tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48394401847693060992024-03-14T06:23:56.901-07:00All My Friends Are PretendA. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-78304509592650619332012-12-12T10:22:00.001-08:002012-12-12T10:23:26.952-08:00How Do I Love These Books? Let Me Count the Ways: I Know This Much Is True<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">For "How Do I
Love These Books? Let Me Count the Ways" I’ll be revisiting the
first times I read books I love and reflecting on what connects me so strongly
to those books.</i></div>
<br />
<br />
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I never said I was loveable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Never said I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">wasn’t </i>a son of a bitch.”--Domenick Birdsey in <i>I Know This Much Is True</i></div>
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<br /></div>
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I’m going to have to be a little bit clinical to get through
this post about <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I Know This Much Is True</i>,
because the connection I have with the novel is so personal and painful that I
can’t get too far into it without sounding hyperbolic or losing the point of
this exercise.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first few times I started this post I burst into tears and had to abandon it. So all I’ll say is that I
read it during a homesick first semester at college and that my own family
rivals Dominick Birdsey’s as far as the darker issues go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will also say that this is my favorite
novel by far.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have books that I love,
buy, re-read, and recommend to friends, but this book is a million miles away
from those. </div>
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<br /></div>
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I love the language in this book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The descriptions are haunting; the emotions
are raw and on the surface; and the alternating voices of Domenick the child,
the young man, and in the present (with a lengthy cameo by Domenick’s
grandfather Domenico) are flawlessly executed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The meandering of the story as Domenick goes about his ruptured daily
life, dipping from time to time into his memory, is as natural as conversation.</div>
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<br /></div>
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This book makes me hurt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A lot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The horrible things in
Domenick’s past make for tough reading and remind me of times of my own
suffering.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But if the book had only been
sad or dark I wouldn’t call it my favorite today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The novel ends with hope, an upward
trajectory out of the past.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I read
the last line I wept with relief at the pure notion of possibility.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now just the first pages are enough to get me
teary-eyed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wally Lamb has written a
beautiful story weaved within it a message I sorely needed when I first read it
that still resonates with me today—I am not alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Be steady, be patient, work to be a better
person, and you may always have hope.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The characters are real and whole, they make terrible
mistakes but strive for goodness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
do what they think is right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> They learn by going where they have to go. </span>Reading it
exposes old wounds to the air, but in doing so it keeps them from festering and
reminds me of the potential for healing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I love this book like I love some people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> And that is really all I can say about it.</span></div>
A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-88905423752138582562012-12-09T12:45:00.002-08:002012-12-09T12:47:40.321-08:00How Do I Love These Books? Let Me Count the Ways: The Hunger Games<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<![endif]--><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">For "How Do I Love These Books? Let Me Count the Ways" I’ll be revisiting the
first times I read books I love and reflecting on what connects
me so strongly to those books.</i>
<br />
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<br /></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Hunger Games </i>series</div>
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I was alone in a foreign country when I found <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Hunger Games</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not technically alone—I was a student in a
graduate program, an exile for a month.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I didn’t know anything about Madrid except that I knew everything.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>History, art, food, music, culture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Turns out that’s nothing when you don’t know
where the grocery store is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Daily life
doesn’t hinge on a deep understanding of political history.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had my own little dorm room, private
bathroom, true grad school luxury.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had
classes in the mornings, incredible classes, but my afternoons and evenings
were free (I didn’t have to do homework since I was basically auditing).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With that free time I went to museums, walked
the streets, and missed my home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
pulled, baffled, on the closed doors of the banks at 3 p.m.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I went to restaurants at 10 p.m., the lone
early dinner patron.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"></span>Look, a
small-town girl in any city is gasping for air anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I spoke the language, I knew where I was, but I was lost.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not map-lost, confused as to how my life had
brought me to the point that I was 4000 miles from my husband and my family, in
the pursuit of enhancing a teaching career that was already on the rise without
these desperate measures.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In my lonely
moments in my closet-sized room I read.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I downloaded <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Dracula</i> to my
iPad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was smutty and fun, but it didn’t
last long.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I read fast, y’all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not sure what to read next, I saw that I had
a free preview of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Hunger Games</i>. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Those weird hours between lunch and bedtime
were long, I figured, what the hell?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everyone
had been talking about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I read the
first chapter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And then I raced down to
the first floor where the WiFi actually worked and immediately bought the
book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I spent the next few days in an
ecstasy of reading that I had not had in quite some time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><br />
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
There
were so many fascinating moments in that month, not the least of which was my
doomed search for ice (at a bar!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They laughed
at me!).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I made friends with a few
darling girls who were my classmates, with whom I had some truly unforgettable
evenings. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But perhaps my need for
stronger connections at that time precipitated my love of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Hunger Games</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps my
isolation fed my connection with the characters, who became so vibrant and real
to me in that time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Haymitch and
Peeta stand out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span> </span>And that’s why I connected so strongly with <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Hunger Games</i>, because of characters who feel so real they’re in the room,
breathing and blinking (or, in the case of Katniss, annoying me to death).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>I raced ahead, read
and re-read, spending as much time with them as I could.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I watched a lot of Psych and Parks and
Rec, not to mention having actual real-world adventures with my friends and on
my own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I did spend a good amount of
time with Peeta and Haymitch and Cinna (and, yes, Katniss), too.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Would I
have had the same connections with the book had I not been in such a unique
situation?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s hard to say.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A similar thing happened with the Harry Potter
series, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Handmaid’s Tale,</i> and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I Know This Much Is True</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And Bridget Jones, for that matter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Blog entries on all of those and more forthcoming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But the pattern is clear: the huge books in
my life came in mostly with enormous emotional connections.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They carried the seeds of things I needed to
make sense of the new world in which I found myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They helped me adjust, allowed me to escape
and then gently steered me back out into the world a little more enlightened, a
little less afraid.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For the record, <i>Catching Fire</i> is my favorite of the series. </div>
A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-20095291695611681562012-10-13T17:14:00.001-07:002012-10-13T17:14:28.427-07:00Write What's in Your Head, Not What You Think Should Be on the Page<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m back!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So
soon!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I’m deviating from my normal
posting-once-per-decade because I said I had a post for another time, and it’s
another time, so here it is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What I said was: “you write what’s in your head, not what you
think should be on the paper”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And you
may have said: “duh”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course a writer
writes what’s in her head.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What else
will she write?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unfortunately I can
state authoritatively that too many writers, those with dollar signs where
their work ethic or devotion to craft should be, think, “YA is selling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Paranormal is selling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Erotica is selling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m good at the
words-putting-together-to-make-sentences.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I will arbitrarily choose one of these to write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wonder where I’ll put my TV in the Tuscan
villa I will buy with all that crazy author money?”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I see things like this I want to drink gin until all
the letters look like squiggly lines.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Because the fact is if you try to write to a trend, you are
a) already too late and b) going to end up with something crappy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Sorry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s my job to be honest with you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well, one of my jobs. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I teach,
tutor, write, and I’m honest with you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
a busy gal.)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I speak from
experience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Once upon a time, I was a
member of the query-weary ranks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sick of
rejection, I noticed that YA seemed so much more successful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hey, I’m a good writer, if I write YA then I
can trick an agent into representing me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Mwuhahaha.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And so forth.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Needless to say, it didn’t work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t the worst thing ever, but it was
just blah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It got requests, but it got
rejected.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then one of my friends, who
reads everything I write, laid it on the line.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>(Don’t you just love friends who are truthful with you?)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He pointed out a couple of weaknesses, but
said in the end he just didn’t enjoy reading it as much as he enjoyed reading
Blessed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Can you guess why?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because I didn’t enjoy <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">writing </i>it as much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I wrote it because I thought it was the easy way in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And there is the harsh, ass-kicking truth:
there is no easy way in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is one
way in, and that’s good writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And you’re
going to have a hard time writing something well if you’re doing it for
dishonest reasons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I misspoke (miswrote?) when I said you have to write what’s
in your head.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You do, but it has to be
in your heart first.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I read widely, so I
feel comfortable in a couple of genres.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I read some YA, but not nearly as much as other things, so I didn’t have
“it”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t in my heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Blessed is in my heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Class of 98 is in my heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And believe me, the next one I write will be
in my heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If you really want to write a story then the characters will
burst out of your head unbidden, ready to wreak havoc on an unsuspecting
world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if you try to hold them back
they’ll host a cagematch in your head.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The only loser is you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But if you
prop up cardboard characters because you think they’re your ticket to fame and
fortune they’ll fall right over the first time a stiff breeze comes along.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Now you might be saying, “Good one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thanks a million.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I already wrote what I love, and the phone
just ain’t ringing”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yeah, that’s a
tough pill to swallow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The only thing I
can point to is my own experience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s
the speedtrain that spirited Blessed away from Rejectionland and into Happytown
(which, as it turns out, is Self-Doubt Village adjacent—but I digress).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a three-fold plan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Stay with me.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I wrote.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wrote
stories that weren’t Blessed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wrote
whiny blog posts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Words, words, words.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I read.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I read <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">On Writing</i>, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Bird by Bird</i>, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Self-Editing
for Fiction Writing</i>, and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Writing the
Breakout Novel</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I actually read <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Bird by Bird </i>multiple times, way before
I actually decided to get into writing seriously.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s just a good guide to life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you haven’t read it, quit reading this and
get it—it’s magnificent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The point is, I
studied what professionals had to say about writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And then…</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I edited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I Flipped
This Novel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I put into Blessed what I
had learned and took out what made it weak.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Voila!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Better novel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Funny how that works.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So my point is: write what you should be writing, not what
you think will make you a big shot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And
if what you should be writing doesn’t help you achieve your goals, then <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">study</i>, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">listen</i>, and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">learn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>Do the work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Fix it. Make it shine. </span>Because that’s all there is. Readers (this includes agents and editors, they read) don't care what's "dead". They respond to what's real.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“The powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse”*—don’t
you want that verse to be something true?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Something personal?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Above all,
don’t you want it to be the best it can be?</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
*<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Shout out to my
homie, Walt Whitman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, not my
homie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He and I don’t get along most of
the time, truth be told.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But he
occasionally said some stuff I can’t argue with.</i></div>
A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-4213396159819310702012-10-11T13:56:00.001-07:002012-10-11T14:45:08.329-07:00Submissions, Advice, and Your Second Book<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Your first manuscript is your baby.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your pride and joy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s going to get you an agent, spark a hot
bidding war between 1-6 of the Big Six, and before you know it Oprah will be
holding it up to a hoard of adoring fans.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Except here’s the reality check: maybe not.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m navigating the murky swamps of submission right now, and
I fully expected to be a basket case.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Instead I’ve found that any rejections don't sting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thinking about possible future rejections, maybe having to
go on a second round, having to shelve Blessed Among Women…nope.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Doesn’t hurt a bit.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And now you’re thinking: she’s crazy <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">and</i> a liar.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I may be the
former, but as anyone who has been on the receiving end of one of my pathetic
excuses will tell you, I am not the latter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m being 100% honest when I say that I’m prepared to let go of Blessed
(for a while) if now is not its time.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A couple of
reasons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The first is that two weeks ago I had a couple of days of
teetering on the brink of genuine tragedy that put the whole “is-my-book-gonna-sell”
waterworks sharply in perspective.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am
not exaggerating when I say that those issues I was facing resolved in a
miraculous way, and thankfully everything is going to be all right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But facing true hardship showed me that
everything that’s happened so far with my book has been a blessing (har har
har), and I need to be grateful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Another is that I was working on my second novel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I got it up to a decent wordcount and sent it
to my agent and my agency’s editor for a dollop of their signature genius on
how to make it sparkle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a novel I started
when I was deep in the late stages of querying Blessed, when things were really
starting to happen, and it was nice to have a work-in-progress as a
distraction.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bonus: I fell as madly in
love with novel #2 (Class of '98) as I did with Blessed, and I proved to myself that I could
do the writing-a-whole-book madness again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s completely different than Blessed—instead
of a darkly sweet and tragic love story, it’s a frothy contemporary time travel—but
you write what’s in your head, not what you think should be on the paper. That's a post for another time.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Hence the point of this post: I’ve seen lately in various
author communities a disquieting trend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Statements like:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Can’t wait to get an agent/self-publish/contract so I can
quit my job!”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The problem: your agent isn’t going to pay you, submissions
could take a ridiculously long time, and both traditional and self-publishing
are not exactly the easy path to Big Money Avenue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As a debut author your advance will likely be
a couple grand doled out over several payments.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In self-publishing, there’s no way to be 100% sure how your book will
do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s fine to fantasize about huge
advances and book tours, but think of it like winning the lottery and be aware
that those things come with their own issues, which brings me to:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“If I write an amazing query, then agents/editors will be
beating down my door.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The problem: if you write an amazing <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">book</i> they will beat down your door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If you fail to do that before you write an amazing query, then they will
request your work, actually read it, and send you a very polite form rejection
telling you to keep on trying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And
amazing means amazing to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">someone</i>, not
to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">everyone</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you could write a book everyone would love
you and Oprah would already be besties and you probably wouldn’t be wasting
time reading this blog.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And even if you
did write an amazing book, there’s still one more step…</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<u>You have to write another one</u>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No excuses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>No exceptions.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Assume that you aren’t Harper Lee.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Assume that if you want to build a career as
a writer in whatever avenue you choose then you will need to build an
audience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And to build an audience, you
need to write books.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plural.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you sign with an agent, he/she will be
delighted to hear that you have other projects in the works.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you self-publish your readers will be glad
to hear you have another title coming out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And no, that doesn’t mean ideas.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Ideas are cheap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They’re
easy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Books are grueling,
put-in-the-hours work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if you have
two or three ready to go, then if the first book doesn’t sell, NBD.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re ready to try again without having to
spend months or years of your life trying to get another book together.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So yes: believe in yourself and your story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But make sure that you have a realistic
picture of what the future holds and your role in making that future a reality.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-76975316260917179322012-08-26T14:00:00.001-07:002012-08-26T17:14:48.741-07:00Frozen<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
There is just no other word for it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am in a cold place right now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For you see, I am not writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d love to blame it on the past couple of
weeks being busy—the first days of a new school year are fun for masochists
only—but in my heart I know no excuse is good enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve eked out a couple of words here and
there; gotten excited about a chunk of time for writing only to, you know, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>actually sit down in front of the computer;
bravely forgone working out or cleaning the house in order to carve out time to
write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But as my schedule settles down I
have no choice but to face it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I am frozen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I
know why.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Fear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sad but true
that four little letters hold so much power.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I sit down to write and what Anne Lamott lovingly refers to as “KFKD”
starts playing in my head:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Hmm, that’s
not very good, is it?” “What, you’ve only got 15,000 words written?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’ll never finish this thing.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Ooh, your agent is gonna HATE this one.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And then I back slowly away from the
computer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I do everything else on my
to-do list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I get desperate: I actually
GRADE. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When a teacher is grading, she <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">really</i> wants to avoid doing whatever it
is she’s supposed to be doing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I know the only way to defeat this is to write—just get it
out there, no worries about if it’s good or not, no worries about if/when I’ll
finish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But the only way to do <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">that</i> is for me to clear this enormous
mental hurdle, and I just haven’t been able to catch any air this week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m a perfectionist at heart, so letting go
of expectations is difficult for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In
the meantime I’m sharing all my insecurities with you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Blogging is writing, right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m building my platform, right?!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ooh, did I grade that last set of
essays?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> I should probably do the dishes. </span>Maybe the dog needs dusting
again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I saw two great plates at the British Museum.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first was inscribed, “Nothing was ever
achieved during sleep.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Right now I’m “asleep”—I’m
procrastinating, I’m fighting the work that needs to be done, and so the end
result is a big fat nothing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need to
wake up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The other plate said, “Everyone fears his destiny.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At the time I thought it was a little dark,
but now I feel like I understand it better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My destiny is not some big shiny prize at the end.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No one is ever going to pat me on the back
and declare, “You’re done with writing forever, thanks for your contribution!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The hard truth is my destiny is the work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So my new to-do list is:</div>
<ol>
<li><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"></span></span></span>Wake up</li>
<li><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"></span></span></span>Warm up</li>
<li><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"></span></span></span>Work</li>
</ol>
Not next week. Not tomorrow. Now.<br />
<br />
Well, after I dust the dog again, of course. A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-34773039619098551892012-08-11T17:08:00.002-07:002012-08-11T17:09:02.482-07:00Agent-Bashing<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have found online writers’ communities, particularly
<a href="http://agentqueryconnect.com/" target="_blank">AgentQuery Connect</a>, to be absolutely indispensable in my (so far short) writing
career.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know there’s no way I’d be
where I am now without the wealth of information and experience available on
that site.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it’s so cool that writers
who have been in the game way longer, who have mind-boggling book deals or
great success self-publishing, spend their precious free time offering free
help to novices out of the goodness of their hearts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So now that I’ve said all those glowing things about my
community of choice, I have noticed as I’ve flitted around some other writers’
communities that the positive culture at AQC is not necessarily the rule.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In addition some writers seem to keep blogs
just to have a repository for their vitriol, typically directed at agents,
editors, and what are ominously called “the Gatekeepers”. Not going to name names, and no links. They're easy enough to find.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
No one understands more than me how humbling and sometimes
demoralizing this process can be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s
something so gut-wrenching about a form reject with your name spelled wrong…and
it’s, like, a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">really </i>common name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And the agent’s name is really unusual, and
you checked it a million times to make sure you spelled her name right….<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ahem.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Hypothetically, of course.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
here’s the thing: agents are professionals, doing a job, and that is the way
their job is done properly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People
blogging proudly about responding with a stream of invectives to those forms
from agents baffle me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I so often see writers online ranting and raving about how
foolish agents are, how they’re obsolete and who needs one in this day of
self-publishing? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But then the same day
they’re posting about how they can’t wait to query Agent X.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s enough to give me whiplash.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I understand feeling hurt, thinking “if they just gave me
and my MS a chance”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But some things for
writers to reflect on before spewing hate on the internet are:</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"></span></span></span>If you really do want to contract with an agent,
think about the fact that what’s on the internet today is there forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, really.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Thanks to caching and Google your words live on long after you delete
them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if they’re attached to your
signature line with all your titles of all your lovely novels…what if Ms.
Prospective Agent Googles your name or title and sees that?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do you think she’ll be itching to work with
you then, however much she loves your work?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span></span>Along those same lines, think about your line of
work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Would you want to work with a
customer/client/student who seethes with rage thinking of those who inhabit
your chosen profession?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know sometimes
you have to…but if you had the choice?<span style="font-family: Symbol;"><span style="font: 7pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Symbol;"><span style="font: 7pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span>Keep in mind that those agents may have passed
on your MS for one of a nearly infinite number of possibilities, some of which
have nothing to do with your genre or your writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If an agent signs a historical based on
French royalty on Tuesday, did my historical based on French royalty sent on <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Thursday</i> have a realistic chance with
that agent?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She clearly likes the genre—it’s
not you, it’s timing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It sucks, but it’s
no one’s fault. </li>
</ul>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.25in;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>I racked up 150 rejections—some because my MS
was still laughably amateurish, some because they could not care less about
royalty, some because they read the first page and their attention drifted to
their game of Draw Something (which, in all fairness, is an awesome game).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I can say with absolute confidence that
not one of those 150+ agents passed on my manuscript because they don’t like
good writing, or don’t recognize quality when they see it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They passed because, for one reason or
another, it wasn’t the right project for them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That’s why you see that phrase in the form rejects, and the kind
rejects, and on every post about what a bummer querying is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because it’s sad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it’s true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And that form reject doesn’t mean it’s
over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It just means you’re on your way.</div>
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<br /></div>A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-92029915085994501712012-08-09T18:16:00.000-07:002012-08-11T17:55:12.507-07:00Introverts: a book you must read<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
My husband and I listen to non-fiction audiobooks on car
trips (when we’re not reading fiction to each other).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nerd power!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Anyway, one of our choices this summer was <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352145/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1344561054&sr=1-1&keywords=quiet" target="_blank"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking</i></a>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have to admit, I was astonished at the
depth of the book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d long known I was
an introvert (thanks Myers-Briggs!), but I’ve never gone so far into
understanding my own life and needs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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One of the most astonishing things I learned was that
"introvert" doesn’t mean "shy".<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That goes a
long way toward explaining why I’m so comfortable in front of a classroom or on
a stage, but feel totally unanchored in a small group of new people at a
party.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It turns out I’m not shy, I just
don’t do well in a group of new people where one is expected to make small
talk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Small talk is tough for me, and I’m
not one of those people who needs contact with others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m content to spend hours on my own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s usually my preference.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
That was my main takeaway from the book—it’s not weird at
all that I don’t mind being the center of attention, but in intimate situations
I’d rather be on my own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Shyness has
nothing to do with introversion—introverts want to be alone most of the time,
but that doesn’t mean they can’t deal with an audience. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It explains why I do so well with job
interviews. In fact, I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">love</i> job
interviews.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love talking in-depth
about things I care about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just can’t
engage with people I don’t know well on a superficial level.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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The point is, it’s a great book, well-researched and fun to
read.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I recommend it for anyone with an
introvert in her life, especially for families and teachers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As the author points out, our world is geared
toward rewarding extroverts, but the value in introverted natures is clear and
worthy of further inspection.</div>A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-47903539792995753472012-08-08T11:16:00.000-07:002012-08-08T17:54:31.795-07:00Home again, home again<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6yAtraDD50tpdX-AFwr2fnk95fKPZ5aQbWZ1mGBjv70ijLmIGw__2i2BEDE0ggh9hI_88mgiaUpjrfgo45FGE-d9eiPIJ-aA54q7Vs_DsgtpQcDX2OimtfTBh54zD_xKtUTnjlro60cg/s1600/Diane.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6yAtraDD50tpdX-AFwr2fnk95fKPZ5aQbWZ1mGBjv70ijLmIGw__2i2BEDE0ggh9hI_88mgiaUpjrfgo45FGE-d9eiPIJ-aA54q7Vs_DsgtpQcDX2OimtfTBh54zD_xKtUTnjlro60cg/s320/Diane.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
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My poor blog, along with everything else in my life, has
been a little neglected as of late.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Late
July/early August has been a whirlwind: several trips (including one to meet my
lovely and amazing agent in London!), an online class, tutoring,
writing/editing, and preplanning week at school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now that it’s all listed out like that I’m
starting to wonder how I got any sleep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>No wonder I’m exhausted!</div>
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<br /></div>
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But now I’m starting to catch up (tell that to the pile of
laundry haunting my hamper), so no more blog neglect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have a couple of things I want to post
about, but since the most exciting thing that happened was London that gets top
priority.</div>
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It started with a whim.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I get regular emails from Delta airlines with info about sales, and one
came the first week of July advertising a sale for one day only, and only to
London from certain cities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Long story
short: the rates were bargain basement, the timing was right, and Atlanta was
one of those cities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How could my
husband and I not go?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So we booked it—completely
oblivious to the fact that we’d be going the day after the Olympic opening
ceremonies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was 100% focused on the
fact that I’d actually get the chance to meet my agent, <a href="http://darleyandersonblog.com/2012/03/14/getting-to-know-clare-wallace-rights-manager-and-associate-agent/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Clare Wallace</a> of the
<a href="http://www.darleyanderson.com/index.html" target="_blank">Darley Anderson Agency</a>, in person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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My husband spent a semester abroad in the UK, so he chose
the hotel and we were off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Clare
generously offered to take me to lunch, so I met her at the agency on Tuesday
afternoon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I presented her with a bottle
of champagne and chocolates for the agency to share, as well as genuinely tacky
“Georgia: Peach State!” shot glasses for Clare and <a href="http://darleyandersonblog.com/2012/03/12/getting-to-know-vicki-le-feuvre-agency-editor/" target="_blank">Vicki</a>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A good Southern girl never shows up
empty-handed. </div>
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I got to meet a couple of people, including <a href="http://www.darleyanderson.com/team.html#DA" target="_blank">Darley Anderson</a>
himself (though sadly some of the agency was out of town hiding from the Olympics, so I didn't get to meet everyone).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I got to have a nice
conversation with him, as he was kind enough to drive me and Clare to our
lunch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He is really such a fascinating
man, a wealth of information about publishing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Even in a twenty-minute car ride he had a lot of great advice to
offer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The agency is currently preparing
for the release of the <a href="http://www.jackreachermovie.com/" target="_blank">Jack Reacher movie</a>, starring Tom Cruise and based on one
of Darley’s client’s books.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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As Clare and I had lunch we discussed the latest iteration
of Blessed Among Women.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had to pick my
jaw up off the floor when she said it’s ready to go out to publishers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know that’s always been the endgame, but it
always seemed so abstract (a separate post on that later).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now it’s happening: Blessed is going out to
editors in September in advance of the Frankfurt Book Fair in October (again, I’m
feeling a lot of feelings about that, they’ll get covered in a later post).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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The thing that struck me most as we chatted was that I
couldn’t have dreamed up an agent that would suit me better than Clare.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She really gets my writing and feels so passionately
about her work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As we discussed it I
could tell that she understood on a deep level what I was trying to say with
the novel, how I wanted to present the characters and their world, their
triumphs and failures.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m going to stop
gushing, but I’ll just say if I was happy to be working with her before we met
I’m ecstatic now.</div>
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Okay: gushing over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>London
was spectacular, although the closest we got to any of the Olympic events was
the TV at the pub (hey, we just wanted to experience the games like true Brits,
okay?).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We did get to spend several hours at the
British museum, which is where I spotted the plate in the picture at the top of this
post.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Guess who that is?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s Diane de Poitiers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of all the treasures the museum could
contain, and of the very few I got to see, I stumble on a portrait of my inspiration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it’s probably a plate she owned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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I like to think it’s a sign.</div>A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-51368463280647777352012-07-13T11:56:00.000-07:002012-07-13T18:02:44.369-07:00Two Years Ago/One Year AgoI was inspired by the blog post of a fellow member of <a href="http://www.anyaharker.com/wordpress/?p=140" target="_blank">AgentQuery Connect*</a>, in which she reflects on how her life was one year ago at this time. When I thought of my own trajectory from last year to now, and to a greater extent from two years ago to now, I freaked a little. The old adage holds: fiction has to pass tests of believability that real life would undoubtedly fail. The past two years of my life have been <i>unbelievable.</i> Let's take a trip back in time, shall we? (Side note: does the time travel aspect now make this blog "paranormal"?)<br />
<br />
Two years ago I was coming off of one of the worst school years (09-10) of my life. I had terrible chemistry with the kids in my classes, I was in conflict with one of my coworkers, and I had to take a break in the middle of all of that to have sinus surgery. Ugh. That spring was so bad that I decided to scale back to part-time for the next school year to recover. I also had some seriously depressing family problems that I don't want to air out on the internet. Put it all together and I was one sad girl.<br />
<br />
But that summer was when things started to turn around. I decided to buck up and start seeing a therapist. My husband and I started working out and I lost weight. That fall I went back to school with renewed vigor and had one of the <i>best </i>school years of my life. My students were darling, and I won a scholarship to study for a month in Madrid.<br />
<br />
Which brings us to one year ago. One year ago today I was in Madrid. I had made a couple of friends, I was already sick to death of ham (madrileños eat SO much ham), and I had done something I never thought I could do in a million years. I had flown across an ocean to spend a month farther from home than I've ever been, all by myself. I had never even been abroad before, and then there I was, living my dream of standing in front of the painting <i>Las meninas</i> in the Prado. Holy crap.<br />
<br />
The decision to make that trip, and then actually going through with it, showed me that for a long time I was living in fear. But when I broke out of my comfort zone and did something scary I could learn from it. So I didn't want to live hiding under a rock anymore. I wanted to do more impossible things. And I did. I left my comfortable teaching job to go back to school. I wrote a novel. I signed with an agent.<br />
<br />
Next year I'll go back to teaching part-time, fulfilling yet another life-long dream: teaching literature. I'll keep writing and my first novel will go on submission.<br />
<br />
Who knows where I'll be this time next year?<br />
<br />
*Hey, I actually remembered to post a link! A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-25021645484362529932012-06-21T18:00:00.002-07:002012-06-21T18:00:46.781-07:00I was a blog guest again...I was a guest on my critique pal and friend Diana Overbey's blog, <a href="http://dianaoverbey.wordpress.com/">Presently in the Past</a>. She's a great novelist and she's got the blog thing down better than me. Enjoy!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://dianaoverbey.wordpress.com/2012/06/21/interview-with-author-amber-leah-brock/">http://dianaoverbey.wordpress.com/2012/06/21/interview-with-author-amber-leah-brock/</a>A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-32368389842600976682012-06-20T10:15:00.002-07:002012-06-20T10:17:19.570-07:00Guest postI was invited to do a guest post about getting The Call on my new writer friend Michelle Hauck's blog. Thanks again to Michelle for asking me! Check it out here: <a href="http://michelle4laughs.blogspot.com/2012/06/getting-call-amber-leah-brock.html">http://michelle4laughs.blogspot.com/2012/06/getting-call-amber-leah-brock.html</a>A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-64545098391040971682012-06-16T11:01:00.001-07:002012-06-16T11:01:17.503-07:00EditingNow that I've covered the changes since I last updated, I'll chat about what I came back to the blog for: to talk about editing. Specifically, to talk about editing after the huge success of contracting with an agent. Because editing on your own, just you in your little writer bubble, is very different from editing based on the suggestions of professionals in the industry. <br />
<br />
Before I start, though, I want to make clear a couple of things. One is that querying can be really brutal and demoralizing. Day after day of checking the email inbox only to find form rejections. Even when the form is kind, even when the agent spells your name right, a rejection is a tough thing to take. So I'm very grateful to be on "the other side", so to speak. Second, the edits that my agent and the agency editor have suggested are only going to make <i>Blessed Among Women</i> stronger, and they are by no means big, overhaul-type edits. It's not like I have to change the whole structure or something. I've been tasked with adding a few critical scenes and expanding some existing moments. They're all very natural additions that fall well in line with the novel's tone and narrative. So, piece of cake, right? <br />
<br />
Here's the baffling thing about success at any level in this process: it is daunting. I am daunted. Because I'm sitting down to write the new material and I'm second-guessing myself big time. I think there are several reasons for this, the most important of which is this: <br />
<br />
It took me six months to get <i>Blessed Among Women</i> to the point where agents even wanted to look at it, and then another three before anyone wanted to represent it. That's not actually very long in the grand scheme of things, but in that time I treated the novel like a full-time job. I wrote, edited, educated myself, wrote, edited...hours upon hours of work. And now I've got a couple of weeks to add segments that live up to the nine-months-of-constant-work level. It's intimidating. I'll start writing and get a few sentences in and think, <i>this isn't the same. Why isn't this the same? </i>And then I wander off to do my nails, because I <i>know</i> that's something I can do really well. <br />
<br />
Unfortunately, beautifully sculpted nails will do nothing to further my writing career. Neither will being afraid of producing something new, even if it's not as polished as what I already have. And in the end I always wander back to the computer like a good little writer. But those moments will continue to pop up where I convince myself that I've lost the magic touch, and my agent will figure out that I'm a hack, and it will all be over. I will still worry that it will all be snatched away from me in the night. <br />
<br />
As far as I can tell, the solution is the same as it's always been: get back to work. So I'll push those little nagging voices to the back of my head and try to listen to the characters again. <br />
<br />
<br />A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-43099587464526452312012-06-16T10:30:00.002-07:002012-06-16T10:33:11.339-07:00Agented!Long time no see...and a lot of things have changed since I last posted. For one, I signed with an agent--the lovely Clare Wallace of the Darley Anderson agency! This is the full story. (Full disclosure: this is the first draft of a post I did as a guest on another writer's blog; I'll link to it when it's published over there.)<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
To give the truest sense of my journey to “The Call”, I want
to start in fall 2011, so that hopefully people can learn from my mistakes a
little faster than I did. You see, in
October 2011, I “finished” my historical novel, <i>Blessed Among Women</i>.
I thought, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">hey, this is just like
what’s in bookstores! I need to get this
to a publisher stat! </i>Then I did a
little research and found out that you don’t send it to a publisher, silly, you
send it to a literary agent with a query letter. So then I sat down to write a query
letter. And boy, did I bomb. I’m deeply ashamed to admit that I went after
some of the top agents in the field with a poorly-written query letter and a
55k word “novel”. When their assistants
got done wiping tears of laughter from their eyes, I got form reject after form
reject.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I feel extremely fortunate that a) I have a hugely
supportive husband who really believed that somewhere in what I had written was
a real novel; b) I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">love</i> researching
things; and c) I am the world’s most stubborn person. Ever.
So I was going to find out what I was doing wrong and fix it.</div>
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First thing: I dug back into the novel and made additions
that enriched the story, and then completely re-wrote the beginning when my
beta readers made the comment that it was a good novel “once they got into
it”. To me that said the beginning was
too slow, so I concentrated on my strong suit (dialogue) to make the opening
punchier. Then I joined the “Where Past
is Prologue” critique group on Agent Query Connect and learned invaluable
lessons. </div>
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In January I started the querying process again and got my
first requests for pages. Hooray! Then I got form rejects on pages. Ouch.
So I set it aside—stepped back, worked on other projects. I thought I had shelved the novel, but it kept
whispering to me from my Documents folder.
In a fit of procrastination on another project I dove back in to my
first love. I read <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Writing the Breakout Novel </i>(Maas), <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">On Writing</i> (King), <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Self-Editing
for Fiction Writers</i> and, for the thousandth time, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Bird by Bird</i> (Lamott). Then
I thrashed my novel into submission based on what I learned. I attacked my query with the same fervor, and
then started sending again in March. </div>
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That’s when things really started to happen. </div>
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I started getting requests—I was still getting rejections,
but now they were personalized, with real suggestions to help <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">my</i> novel, and invitations to
re-submit. I incorporated those
suggestions and then sent another batch.
If it sounds like I sent a lot of queries, it’s because I sent a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">lot</i> of queries. Over 130.
Maybe even way over 130. 130 is
when I stopped counting. But therein
lies the biggest lesson of all. So many
of those were losses before I ever hit send because I didn’t do my
homework. I thought I was done before I
even really started. The lesson is:
study up and play by the rules. The
agents who are turning people down are not bad people who can’t see your
brilliance. They are businesspeople who
have a job to do and their own rules to play by when they submit to publishers. </div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
So I sent my just-good-enough query plus the first 30ish
pages to Clare Wallace of the Darley Anderson Agency (among others—I sent out
batches of ten). Within a couple of
days, I got an email from the agency’s editor, the delightful Vicki LeFeuvre. She and Clare and read the first part and
wanted a synopsis and a full on exclusive.
I know exclusives are a hot-button issue among authors, but I was really
drawn to the agency. I decided it would
be worth a delay in sending material to other agents and granted the
exclusive. When the read the full they
approached me with a suggestion for revision that would draw the novel more to
the “faction” side of historical fiction (basically, they wanted me to draw in
more of the true historical element that inspired the novel). I considered it, decided I’d give it a shot
and see how I felt about the changes. </div>
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Well, they’re the experts for a reason. The suggestions strengthened the novel
enormously. I sent the revision and got
an email from Clare a couple of weeks later.
I was actually standing in the grocery store when I opened the
email! She said she wanted to talk about
representation. Let me tell you, there
is no better feeling than standing in the frozen foods aisle reading those words. Several days later my phone was ringing and I
was trying to keep my cool. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We talked for about thirty minutes, but I knew immediately
that she was the right one. Her vision
for the novel perfectly aligned with mine, and she was excited to hear about
the other projects I’m working on. She
sent me the contract later that afternoon.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I know this is long, but if it saves anyone some heartache
it’s worth it. I learned a lot about
patience in this process, and it’s what served me best.</div>A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-82092427917386271292011-11-21T19:27:00.000-08:002011-11-21T19:27:38.903-08:00Critique GroupI am very lucky to have found a critique group to read Blessed Among Women. Though it's a non-traditional historical (which I know makes it a tough critique) it does seem to resonate, and my group has so far been giving me dynamite feedback. Apparently I have character on lock--setting is my issue. I think that's a problem I'll continue to have. I hate taking time away from my dialogue to describe things, but that's very necessary. I need to make myself do it. The world-building involved with the fantasy novel makes that a little less of an issue.<br />
<br />
I've also been in the process of edit/re-edit/edit again/dammit, how'd I miss that typo? The to-be-or-not-to-be nature of contractions in HiFi (how cool is that for historical fiction?) has also been bugging me. On the one hand, we can't hope to approximate how people spoke with one another several centuries ago, which is why I'm more than tempted to go stylistically natural and let the characters have a conversation. But on the other hand, there's a certain voice readers of HiFi expect, and if I don't deliver, it makes my book that much less likely to sell. Well, less likely to get to the agent stage, honestly.<br />
<br />
I feel tough. July in Madrid made me believe that I could do things that I'd never have attempted otherwise. And hell, if all else fails, I've got a vision board, dammit. (Thanks, Happy Endings.) If it's not this book, it will be the next. Or, God help me, the next.A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-70185563330799923092011-11-18T05:14:00.000-08:002011-11-18T05:14:03.500-08:00SoundtracksI know I'm not alone in this, but whenever I'm deep into a story I need the music to accompany it. For Blessed Among Women I have no fewer than seven soundtracks (my husband made five--he's way more knowledgeable about current music than I am). Some of them are general, some are geared toward specific characters, but all of them helped me to flesh out certain things and expand.<br />
<br />
Sample of songs on Blessed soundtracks:<br />
"There Is No Rose of Such Virtue", Sting<br />
"Gotta Have You", The Weepies<br />
"Only You", Joshua Radin<br />
"My Body Is a Cage", Peter Gabriel (cover)<br />
"Skinny Love", Bon Iver<br />
"99 Problems" (no, really), Hugo (cover)<br />
"The Scientist", Willie Nelson (cover)<br />
"Scarborough Fair", Simon and Garfunkel<br />
"Possession", Sarah McLachlan<br />
"Fear", Sarah McLachlan<br />
"King of May", Natalie Merchant<br />
"Mess", Ben Folds Five<br />
"Worn Me Down", Rachel Yamagata<br />
<br />
There's much more obviously, so as I continue to work with Blessed I'll post more.A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-70329376254868943722011-11-17T08:55:00.000-08:002011-11-17T08:55:45.918-08:00Checking InboxI have come to deeply detest the fine people that email ads, daily deals, etc. Not that they've actually done anything wrong. I did tell them that I wanted to know more about their various services (although Linkedin is wearing out its welcome, fast). It's not them, it's me. I have my gmail up all day, and every time I glance at it and see "Inbox (1)" my heart skips a beat. Of course I'm hoping that it's Ms. Amazing Agent, writing to tell me that if she doesn't represent me then she's out of the business forever. It's usually from J. Crew.<br />
<br />
I finished the first draft of the first chapter revision/overhaul. It was surprising how much of the original I was able to salvage (and gratifying, I had a lot of babies I didn't want to kill). It goes to the critique group tomorrow, and to say that I'm nervous is an understatement. As long as they don't tell me that it made their eyes bleed, or made them wish they were illiterate, I'll be happy.A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-66483039703650953112011-11-16T17:21:00.001-08:002011-11-16T17:21:01.226-08:00Ugh.Just realized I have to overhaul my first chapter. Fuuuuuuuuu...A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-74974904547535664702011-11-16T04:56:00.000-08:002011-11-16T04:56:45.417-08:00Likeable Characters vs. Unlikeable CharactersI had a friend read Blessed, and one of his first comments was that he didn't like Thomas (one of the MC). I weirdly felt like I had done my job. Because Thomas is really just a big baby. He's selfish and sulky--mainly because he's a young man, and he's immature. He's not supposed to be perfect. He's got some deep-rooted psychological issues. But I love him. My husband loves him. Because we know him really well.<br />
<br />
The other MC, Joane, is just sort of blah to me. She's nice, and she certainly grows a lot by the end of the novel. But she's very vanilla. I think what happens to her is more interesting than she herself is. My favorite character is Thomas's brother, but I think so far I'm the only one that's read it that feels that way.<br />
<br />
My husband, he is probably most intrigued by Marie, Thomas's wife and his personal antagonist (I wouldn't call her an antagonist in the traditional sense). I really don't care for her, but a lot of people who've read the MS are interested in her. You hear a lot at the beginning about what a nightmare she is (from Thomas, natch), and then she surprises you. But I still get sick of her pretty fast.<br />
<br />
And then there's the main antagonist, Richard, who everyone agrees is the worst. And, yet, people tell me gleefully that they "like" him. He's someone to root against. He is not doing a half-assed job of being bad. He is putting his whole ass into being a rat bastard, and he's really good at it.<br />
<br />
Interesting to reflect on the lives that characters take on once their outside of your head. I heard a story about Toni Morrison at a conference, listening to papers on her various works. When asked how she felt about them, she said that they were wonderful, but that she had no idea what books those people were talking about. It's disorienting to have a product of your head reflected back at you through someone else's eyes.<br />
<br />
(And, yes, I have people other than friends and family reading the story. I like my honest critiques as well as my flattering ones.)A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4839440184769306099.post-38931644816867967342011-11-15T05:25:00.000-08:002011-11-15T05:25:42.082-08:00Writing BlogI've set this up to be my writing blog, to keep track of my works in progress (and probably to also whine about the query process). I currently have two manuscripts that I'm pounding away at:<br />
<br />
BLESSED AMONG WOMEN, a historical novel very loosely based on the love affair between Henri II of France and Diane de Poitiers, set in the 1530s. That one is in the final critique stage (I do so desperately hope), and I'm tentatively sending out queries.<br />
<br />
and<br />
<br />
SEASONS, a YA fantasy in which the seasons are created by a long-lived race of people in an isolated kingdom. It's coming along nicely, I'm about 8,000 words in.A. L. Brockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13582233319410248557noreply@blogger.com0